Love Me Harder
by nightmvre
Summary: Settling into domesticity for the night, with thoughts of another woman clouding my head. / In which Cat and a married Beck explore the meaning of extramarital. [BeckxCat, M later on]
1. keeping up appearances

**A/N: **I've been watching Mad Men during my holiday and wanted to step out of my Bori-comfort zone.

Please review and subscribe if you like it!

Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious.

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I slammed the door of my Jaguar behind me, jogging up the steps to my Newport Beach mansion, stabbing the key into its hole before opening the front door of my home. Normally, upon coming home, I'd find a silent home with my children mesmerized in front of the television and my wife thumbing through magazines on the couch. But today, my home was alive with noise and excitement. But, to be reasonable, I usually arrived home at about 8 or 9, if I even bothered to come home at all, and today I arrived at 6.

"Tori? I'm home," I called as I trekked further into the house.

"In here!" she called, before her voice blended in with the rest of the chatter. I followed her voice to the living room where I found my kids rolling around with a familiar dog whose name I couldn't quite place and my wife sitting on the couch with a glass of wine in her hand as she spoke to a person who sat in the couch across from her. She looked up from her conversation and beamed at me.

"Hey! You're home early!" she said as she put her glass down and approached me, hugging me and giving me a full kiss on my lips before saying, "Look who's here!"

Our guest turned around from her seat, smiling at me and raising her glass of wine in acknowledgment. "Hey, Beck!"

"Oh, hey, Cat, didn't know who you were for a sec," I said in reply, taking a seat on an armchair adjacent to her. "Guess the dog was a big hint. What brings you out to Newport?"

"Yeah, this my new dog, Cinnamon!" she laughed. "Well I just rescued him for a shelter closeby so I thought I'd visit you guys and see your fancy new house! It's amazing!"

"Isn't it? We just finished decorating," Tori said as she plopped down in my lap. "The only thing is the commute. It's more than an hour away from Beck's office in Hollywood, without terrible LA traffic! That's why I was surprised he was home so early. Sometimes he just stays the night in our old apartment in Beverly Hills to avoid the commute."

"Small sacrifices for my wife's dream house," I muttered. "Besides, it's a better place for the kids to grow up in. Better environment, a lot more suburban than Beverly Hills."

"Yeah, I bet they like it! Lots of hide-and-seek places in such a big house, right, kids?" Cat asked.

"We like the pool a lot," Ben smiled. At 5 years old, he was our oldest child, born just eleven months after our wedding. April came just two years after him, when Tori and I were 27. April nodded shyly along with her brother before returning her attention to Cinnamon. She was almost a carbon copy of Tori, as Ben was of me.

"So how have you been, Cat? What've you been up to?" I asked, shifting under Tori's weight.

"Well I just came back from New York. I was visiting my brother, he's on broadway now," she smiled. "I'm just working on another album right now and I booked a few movie spots too, but those don't start shooting until the end of the summer."

"Isn't she amazing?" Tori exclaimed. "What I wouldn't give to be acting right now! I was in talks for a few roles, but I really want to focus on the kids right now." She was lying; I took many days off during pilot season so that Tori could attend auditions but she hadn't been called back for many. I offered her help, but she refused, stating she didn't need her "producer-husband's Hollywood influence to get her a role."

"I'm sure you won't have any trouble finding a role once you're ready," Cat giggled. "30 with two kids but you still look 22!" She checked the watch on her wrist and looked out our large windows. "I better get on the road. Calabasas is a long way from Newport." She stood up, with Tori following suit, and the two embraced.

"I'm so glad you stopped by! You should visit more often, I never see you anymore!" Tori said as they pulled apart.

"Of course! And if you're ever in Calabasas, you should call! I've got lots of dogs for the kids to play with if you two ever need a babysitter," she said.

"Well I'm sure the kids will be happy to make the hour-and-a-half trip there just to see them," I said as I gave Cat a quick hug.

"Mommy, we're hungry!" Ben whined.

"Oh crap, I lost track of time. I gotta make them some dinner quick, Beck will see you out!" Tori said as she shuffled into the kitchen. "Bye, Cat!"

"Bye, Tori!" Cat said as she put on her coat and walked towards the door, with me on her heels. "Really a beautiful house you have, Beck, it must have cost a fortune," she said as we walked through the door. I closed it behind us, only to find myself pressed against it, with Cat's mouth on my own. "Surprised?"

"Well, I certainly wasn't expecting to see you twice today," I smiled before kissing her again, wrapping my arms around her and holding her tight against me.

"Got to keep up appearances for your wife," she said with a devilish smile. "When am I going to see you again?"

"I could stay in Beverly Hills tomorrow night, tell Tori I'm too tired to drive home," I offered, ducking my head to kiss her once on the cheek. "I could meet you somewhere tonight," once on her jawline. "I could play hooky tomorrow, tell my secretary to tell Tori I'm in meetings all day, and drive up to your place," last on her neck.

Cat giggled under her breath. "I'll let you know," she kissed me one last time before turning on her heel and getting into her BMW. She ignited the engine and winked at me before speeding off of my property. I shook my head before hurrying back into my house to find Tori making spaghetti.

"Man, Cat still talks just as much as she did in high school," I said with an air of annoyance. "Couldn't get her to shut up fast enough." Tori laughed as she stood over the boiling noodles. I walked behind her and wrapped her into a hug from the back, craning my neck to kiss her cheek. "I missed you."

She spun in my arms to face me. "I missed you too," she said with a wide smile. "Get the kids ready for dinner, it'll be ready in a sec."

"Got it, chief," I said before leaving her in the kitchen and herding the kids into the bathroom to wash their hands, settling into domesticity for the night, with thoughts of another woman clouding my head.


	2. i'm not rhonda

**A/N:** Thanks for the reviews, especially all the positive ones! I know Bat is an unusual pairing but I hope you all will bear with me; I've been strictly Bori for a while and I truly just wanted to try something different. But if you really can't stand Bat and will only complain about my writing, kindly refrain from reading my fic. Here's the second chapter, review and subscribe! I welcome all comments and suggestions!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Victorious.

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I woke up to fur in my face and unrelenting licks covering the surface of my face. I squealed as I received my daily wake-up call from the many dogs that inhabited my house and, consequently, my bed. I giggled as they scurried away, leaving me alone in my grand, billowy bed. It had been weeks since I'd been in my own home. Since I had returned from New York, I'd spent all my nights in Beck( and Tori)'s Beverly Hills apartment, even after he himself had left, drowning in sheets marked with his scent and dreaming of his return.

Now that I was back in my own home, I spent most of my night overthinking and worrying about Tori finding out about me and Beck. I wasn't sure if what I felt was guilt. Was it solely my fault? This affair couldn't have happened if Beck wasn't a part of it. He wouldn't resort to an affair unless he was truly unhappy and unsatisfied with his marriage. It was thoughts like these that I used to rationalize my behavior and my actions with Beck.

Tori was a good friend, they both were. But when I was around him, I couldn't control myself. Beck was always the little crush I kept in the back of my mind and at the bottom of my heart. He was someone I could see myself with, regardless of who I was with or where I was in my life. He was someone I always had such a strong connection with, that I could talk to so easily. Evidently, he was someone I never had a chance with before this, if you could even call this a chance.

The first day of freshman year, Jade spotted him and claimed him as her own. Knowing I could never go toe-to-toe with her, that she was my friend, and that I didn't want to hurt her, I backed off. When he and Jade broke up, I felt the smallest hope in my heart. It was towards the end of senior year; we would all be going our separate ways and soon enough, we would be far enough from Jade to not be afraid of her finding out. Soon enough, none of that would matter, because he had already busied himself with Tori Vega.

After high school, I pushed Beck out of my head. I focused on my career and skyrocketed to the top of the pop charts without anyone's help. The rest of my 20s was filled with studio time, performances, promotional tours, interviews, music videos, and even film roles. Meanwhile, Beck's talent was cultivating into his and Robbie's production company, coming out with one box office hit after another and earning Beck the title of Hollywood's newest, youngest, and most handsome producer. During this time, I was still in steady contact with Tori, who confessed that as she got older, the fewer roles she was receiving and how she was desperate to marry Beck for the stability and security he could offer her.

I thought her intentions were terrible and that that was no reason to marry anyone! But at the same time, Beck loved her and I knew that, regardless of her intentions, Tori loved him as well. I kept my mouth shut and watched as everything fell into place for them. To top it all off, I was even a bridesmaid at their wedding, gritting my teeth at the moment the minister asked if anyone objected to the union. Less than a year later, Tori was pregnant with Beck's child and I was miserable and lonely travelling from city to city singing songs about him.

Groaning, I rose from bed and showered, trying to wash the guilt from my skin but my mind still littered with thoughts of him. I wanted to see him again. I knew I shouldn't, but I was drawn to him and the sheer thrill of being involved with a married man. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before; my entire life I had taken the safe route, which was why I never ended up with Beck during high school. Now was the time to be bold and take chances. This wasn't the best or the most morally sound way, of course. I'm sure I could've felt the same thrills skydiving or getting a tattoo as I did sneaking around with a good friend's husband.

It was there, under my showerhead at 12 in the afternoon, that I decided that I was going to do things for my own happiness, regardless of how selfish I might become. Up until then, I had made decisions with the future in mind, but in that moment, I wanted to live in the moment and the moment was yearning for Beck's presence. I hopped out my shower and rushed to get ready, letting my long hair flow down my back, donning a dark pair of sunglasses to conceal my identity, putting on a trench coat and finally stepping into a pair of heels.

Care of my BMW, I arrived at Beck's studio in an hour, discreetly asking a doorman to point me to his office, where his secretary was stationed outside. Lowering my sunglasses so that his secretary could recognize me, I spoke in a hushed tone. "Hey, I'm Cat Valentine, I'm a friend of Mr. Oliver's visiting. I know he's super busy and super important, but could I just pop in to surprise him? I promise to take all the blame if he gets mad." I pleaded with my signature smile and Beck's secretary, in her shock, meekly nodded and I proceeded to enter his office.

I turned the doorknob, eliciting a swift reflexive response from Beck. "Rhonda, you didn't buzz me," he said quietly, in a harsh voice. I quickly shut the door behind me and stood with my back flush against it.

Taking off my glasses, I met Beck's eyes, prompting me to freeze and my heart to skip a beat, and all I could manage to say was, "It's not Rhonda."


	3. discussing the contract

**A/N**: Sorry for the wait, but now it's summer and I'll have time to update!

Please read and review but kindly save your "Ew, Beck and Cat?!" comments. I know, it's an unconventional pairing. Don't like it? Don't read it!

To those who are still intrigued by the unusual pairing, I hope you enjoy this chapter! Review and subscribe.

Love, nightmvre 3

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Victorious.

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"Cat!" I shouted in a whisper. "What are you doing here?" Standing from my seat behind the desk, I scurried around my desk to approach my mistress.

She shrugged. "Had nothing else to do," Cat giggled, batting her eyelashes at me. She sauntered over to me in her brown trench coat and my eyes traveled from the bottom of her stiletto to the top of her knee, where her coat barely brushed.

I took a breath and relaxed my stance, taking a step back to lean against my desk. "I highly doubt that," I said with an eyebrow cocked.

Cat scoffed and began to walk the perimeter of my office, following the curve of its semicircular shape. One by one, she lowered the shade on each window. "And why is that?"

I examined my fingernails, trying my best not to follow her movements with my eyes. "I don't know, Cat," I began. "You're kind of a multimillionaire, platinum-recording artist, actress, and model. I figure you'd have _something_ to do besides visit little old me."

After lowering the last shade, Cat came to stand between my two legs. "Oh, but you're just the person I wanted to see, Beck," she smiled, slowly untying the belt on her trench coat to reveal lingerie that left little to the imagination.

Keeping my eyes trained on hers, I mimicked her saying, "And why is that?" I leaned in a little, just centimeters from her face. "You just woke up and had a sudden urge to get me fired and divorced in one day?" I moved back, letting my eyes roam. Her high heels elevated her, but she still stood a considerable amount below me. Her long, brown hair cascaded down her shoulders to the middle of her back. Her lipstick complemented her already full lips and I could've sworn I heard them calling my name. Her black brassiere collected and lifted her assets so that they were the center of attention and her underwear looked thin enough to rip in one swift movement.

She made a face, one of feigned shock. "Now who said anything about getting you fired? I'm sure Rhonda knows how to keep a secret or two," Cat winked. "Besides, I love your job. I love how you can use it as an excuse to stay close to me, I love how I can visit you any time I want, I love seeing you in your fancy suits, and I love thinking about you taking me in this office."

"I'll assure you, you're not the only one who's thought about it," I said, reaching a hand out to brush her arm. She reciprocated my motion by fully dropping the trench coat and wrapping her arms around my neck.

"Tell me about it," she commanded. Cat pecked my lips, then moved to kiss my cheek, slowly retreating down a path to my neck.

It was hard to maintain my focus, with her ministrations clouding both my mind and my judgment. I moved my hand to trace paths along her upper thigh as I tried to summon words to my brain. Speaking slowly and in a low tone in her ear, I said, "I constantly think about bending you over that desk, with one hand on your back and the other pulling your hair." I felt her a shiver move through her body. "And if not that, I think about letting you sit in the seat behind the desk, with me on my knees, eating you on my lunch break." She hummed as she continued to pepper my skin with kisses. "And if not that, then I think about pushing everything off my desk, lying on my back, and letting you ride me all afternoon." This time, I heard her gasp, feeling her legs shift next to me. "Everything alright, Ms. Valentine?"

She took a second to collect herself before taking a step back. She crouched down to the floor to pick up her coat and wrapped it tight around her. "Well, Mr. Oliver, now that we've had a chance to discuss our contract, I'll take a little time to review the details," Cat said, holding her hand out for me to shake.

With a raised eyebrow, I gave her hand a nice, firm shake before using my grip to pull her closer to me. I took the opportunity to whisper a few words to her. "I'll try to sneak out early. I want you to be at our apartment, in the study, and wearing the exact same thing by the time I get home." She giggled low in her throat. "Is that clear, Ms. Valentine?"

Cat took a back and leaned forward, giving me a view of her ample cleavage while simultaneously brushing the bulge in my pants. "Crystal clear, Mr. Oliver," she whispered with a wink before turning on her heel, putting on her sunglasses, and slipping out the door. Once I heard the door click, I collapsed against my desk. She drove me crazy and turned me on more than any other woman ever had. My mind moved quickly, trying to devise a plan to sneak out inconspicuously and as fast as possible, thinking of the fun that awaited me at the apartment I used to share with my wife and kids. I felt little remorse, choosing to distract myself with memories of Cat and I, engaged in a passion unlike any other.


	4. beautiful but hollow

I hurried into the elevator, pressing the button for the lobby of Beck's office building. I felt as if I had just won the Olympics. I was no longer Cat Valentine, Tori and Jade's bubbly but airheaded sidekick. I was Cat Valentine, Grammy-winning recording artist, Oscar-winning actress, and seductive temptress. Granted, it wasn't really a great or honorable reason to feel so triumphant, but you take what you can get. As for me, I was finally taking what I wanted. I was finally taking my happiness into my own hands, and even risking my morality by fighting dirty.

Once I reached the lobby, the elevator doors opened, revealing the silhouette of a tall man with a curly mop atop his head. Upon hearing the ding behind him, he whirled around, only for his eyes to fall on me. I still had my coat and sunglasses on and, for the most part, I was unrecognizable; it would take someone who really knew me to recognize me. Unfortunately, the man at the other side of the door was none other than Robbie Shapiro, and who knew me better than him. He raised an eyebrow and opened his mouth to speak but I zeroed in on the lobby door and walked past him, briskly, but subtly as possible. I kept my head down, being sure to limp my way to the door, so as to throw off Robbie's strong intuition.

Besides Tori, he was the last person I want to see. Now, it was no surprise. Robbie had been in love with me throughout high school and even bleeding a little into college. As sweet as he was and even though we did explore the idea of a relationship, even slightly, I never felt a strong connection towards him. Sure, we had decent chemistry and could talk for a while, but I didn't find myself being drawn to Robbie the way I was drawn to Beck. And even though I was attracted to Beck on a level that almost felt animalistic, I appreciated his mind above anything; he was intelligent, creative, and thoughtful, everything I looked for.

Aside from a fling, Robbie and I were great friends and I'd still consider him to be a close friend of mine. I've told him secrets I swore I'd never tell anybody and I feared that, if I were to see him and speak to him, I'd spill the beans on my affair with Beck. Beck and Robbie were still business partners; I could forgive myself for risking my friendship with Robbie, but not his business or relationship with Beck. I only sighed a breath of relief upon arriving to my car. I zipped out of the parking garage and made my way towards Beck's apartment.

Beck and Tori had purchased the apartment right after they got married. I felt dirty being there sometimes but I was easily distracted by Beck's presence and constant affection. I arrived at the apartment thirty minutes after leaving Beck's office, a rare feat with L.A. traffic. I slipped the key out of the coin purse of my wallet and turned it, revealing a hollow apartment. The apartment was still completely furnished, as Tori elected to buy all new furniture for their Newport Beach mansion, but it lacked personality. It didn't feel like a home, as beautiful and pristine as it was. Aside from that, Beck and I only vacated the bedroom, which we were sure to keep nice and tidy in case Tori ever decided to pop in for a visit.

My high heels clacked and sent an echo throughout the high-end loft as I stroked the leather couches with my long fingernails. It hurt imagining the memories Tori and Beck shared here: their first few weeks of marriage, bringing their first child home from the hospital, dinner parties for uptight L.A. businessmen. I giggled soon after, thinking about how promiscuous I was in the first years of Beck's marriage and all the sex I had with men I never encountered again while Beck was busy being boring and married.

I thought of my boy-band boyfriend, the incessant harassment I received from his teenage fangirls through Twitter, and all the Skype dates we'd have in lieu of actually seeing each other, considering he lived on the other side of the world. I thought of the soulful singer I left my boy-band boyfriend for, how we'd spend hours collaborating in the studio, then collaborating in a different way at home. I thought of the rapper I dated briefly but passionately, and the ways he satisfied me beyond measure and the ways that he didn't satisfy me at all. Suddenly, I felt a lot better reminiscing about all the men I had claimed in my early twenties, all the boyfriends I had, while Beck was stuck at home with Tori and a couple of kids. The thought was comforting, but not at all; I wished I had been the girl Beck had chosen to spend the rest of his life with, but I was just the girl he had chosen to spend the night with.

I reached the study that Beck had used as his home office when he still lived there. There was a large black bookshelf that occupied an entire wall, shutters that were always kept closed as Beck hated bright light when he worked, and a sleek desk adjacent to the bookshelf. I removed my trench coat and sunglasses and placed them delicately on an end table next to the door, taking a seat on the desk chair, still only in my heels and skimpy attire. I drowned out thoughts of insecurity, sadness, and hesitation with my deep-rooted anticipation to see Beck, be in his presence, and simply be close to him and hoped with all my will that that would be enough to satisfy me.


End file.
